I was going through some files on my computer, chucking ones that were old or duplicates, when I found the excerpt from the book The Little Prince that your Grandma read at your memorial service. And all of a sudden, I was crying. I haven’t cried over you in so long…
Grief shows up in strange places, and I guess it never really heals all the way.
I, too, am going back home today…It is much farther… it is much more difficult…Tonight…my star can be found right above the place where I came to the Earth…At night you will look up at the stars. Where I live everything is so small that I cannot show you where my star is to be found.
It is better, like that. My star will just be one of the stars, for you. And so you will love to watch all the stars in the heavens… they will all be your friends…In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night… you– only you– will have stars that can laugh! And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me.
And you will sometimes open your window, so, for that pleasure… and your friends will be properly astonished to see you laughing as you look up at the sky! Then you will say to them, ‘Yes, the stars always make me laugh!’ And they will think you are crazy. It will be a very shabby trick that I shall have played on you…It will be as if, in place of the stars, I had given you a great number of little bells that knew how to laugh…
You will suffer. I shall look as if I were dead; and that will not be true…You understand…it is too far. I cannot carry this body with me. It is too heavy. But it will be like an old abandoned shell. There is nothing sad about old shells…You know, it will be very nice.
I, too, shall look at the stars. All the stars will be wells with a rusty pulley. All the stars will pour out fresh water for me to drink…That will be so amusing! You will have five hundred million little bells, and I shall have five hundred million springs of fresh water…Here it is. Let me go on by myself.